Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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