I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
wow bdsm is so cute
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize