you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
