break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket