ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Randomize
