i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
