can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
