I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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