she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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