OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
