How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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