You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
