WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
they call him Oral-B. enough said
How external is "for external use only"?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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