It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
