We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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