It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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