My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize