you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
