so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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