your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
