when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize