so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
