Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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