i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
