and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
