So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
