I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
it was like eating out sand paper
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
