you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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