How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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