is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
