i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
When are your genitals available?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
