so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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