this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
