I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
