Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
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