There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
