If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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