That's intense
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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