i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I just blew my weed a kiss
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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