What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
