And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
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The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
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So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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