Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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