Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
