dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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