sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
