Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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