Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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