Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
