Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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