I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Randomize
