I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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